What leadership roles
are most important in your life right now?
- As a mother, I am a leader and advisor/mentor to my 19-year old daughter.
- As an instructor, I design and lead classes on self-development, including leadership skills.
- As VP of Career Development for AHRMA, I serve as a leader to volunteers.
- As a certified women’s self-defense instructor, I lead classes that help women see that they are empowered and have viable options to use if they are attacked.
- As a career consultant, I advise individuals on career-related matters, leading them to see solutions for getting unstuck and to develop their own vision/plan to get where they want to go.
When was the first time
you identified yourself as a leader?
On reflection, I would say that the first time I saw
myself a leader – even though I didn’t realize that’s what I was at the time –
was when I agreed to abide by my mother’s directive to set a good example
because, as the oldest of four children, my siblings looked up to me. But I consciously took on my first actual
leadership role starting at about age 11.
That was when I was frequently put “in charge” after school and, later,
during the summers while my parents were at work. Additionally, my mother would depend on me to
help cook for the family when she worked overtime, which happened pretty
regularly since she was a business owner/operator.
When you think back,
what leadership role brought about the most personal growth?
Every leadership role has brought opportunities for
personal growth, but a really poignant growth moment for me happened when I was
19 years old. I was attending college
part time while working full time for a hotel restaurant. As hostess/manager, I reported to the hotel’s
general manager and was placed in charge of the wait staff in the restaurant. Though I had previously been an assistant
manager for an ice cream shop, this was my first real experience as a
professional leader/manager. We had a
diverse team, and most of the food servers were almost twice my age. One woman – a longtime professional waitress who
was very efficient and had a great sense of humor – was old enough to be my
grandmother.
Because it was a hotel restaurant, we were open every day
of the week and on holidays. The
restaurant planned to offer a buffet on Thanksgiving Day, and so, to be fair, I
scheduled shorter-than-usual shifts for everyone on the team, including myself. That way no one had preferential treatment in
getting the day off – each person had some time on the schedule. At our staff meeting, everyone agreed that it
was the most reasonable solution… except for one of the food servers, a mother
in her 30s who expressed her displeasure at having to work even a small shift
that day.
At that point, I decided that I had to take a dominant
stance, which was not my preferred style, in order to thwart any possible
dissent that this woman was trying to stir up.
I firmly told everyone that I appreciated their cooperation in working
the special rotating schedule and that if they did not show for their shift,
they would be fired. In the end, the
woman didn’t seem to believe me – after all I was a young manager who was
usually cheerful and kind to everyone, giving the employees a certain measure
of autonomy. (I dislike being micromanaged;
therefore, I try to avoid being a micromanager.) So she didn’t show up, making us
short-staffed.
Naturally, it fell to me to cover for her. I acted as hostess and food server that day
by extending my own shift. I called my
family to tell them not to wait for me to serve Thanksgiving dinner. I would eat leftovers later. In stepping up to cover for the missing
employee, it increased the respect my team had for me… they seemed to work even
harder for me after that.
When the employee showed up the next day, I confronted
her about skipping out on us. She acted
a bit haughty and self-righteous, apparently still not believing that I would
dare to fire her. If fact, she even said
as much. So I calmly and professionally dismissed
her.
Considering how annoyed I was at the time, I was proud of
the way I handled it. This was the first
time I had to fire someone, and it was important because it taught me several
valuable things about leadership, such as:
- Always follow through and do what you say you’re going to do, even if it’s difficult.
- Always handle firing someone with dignity and professionalism.
- Others will respect you for holding everyone equally to a high standard.
- Sometimes it’s necessary to adapt your own preferred style when the situation calls for it.
- People will respect you more if you roll up your sleeves and do what it takes rather than sit back in your own position of power and let them do all the work.
- And, most importantly, that it’s exactly like my mother had said – as a leader, everyone is watching you and how you behave. You do lead by example.
As I said, every role has brought opportunities for
personal growth. Most recently, during
my term as VP of Career Development for AHRMA, I’ve learned the value of being
a leader with vision and how to inspire others to not only follow that vision
but to expand it into an even better one.
My mentoring ability has grown as I’ve encouraged the
growth of those who “report” to me as committee leaders and volunteers. Fortunately, this has spilled over into my
personal life and has helped me guide my daughter more effectively as she makes
the transition into adulthood.
And every time I teach a class, I gain new perspectives
from the participants about what is valued in excellent leaders. This, in turn, reminds me of what I value and
how I would like to be perceived as a leader.
What do you want your
legacy to be? What mark do you hope to leave in the minds and hearts of those
who follow you?
Over the years, I’ve come to realize that true motivation
is self-generated. Each person must find
their own motivations for doing what they want or what is expected of
them. This means that the best leaders
don’t motivate. Instead, they inspire others to follow.
Because I am constantly inspired to develop my own
potential, I want to inspire others to develop their own potential. This is clearly part of my personal mission. I’m also very certain that rather than lead
others down my path, I want to inspire them to lead themselves down their own
paths. I want every individual I come
into contact with to recognize his/her own “inner leader” and to realize just
how much life-directing power he/she possesses.
One day, as they toast me at my 100th
birthday, I hope to be remembered as a servant leader
who will have approached every endeavor with a high sense of honest awareness,
integrity, and enthusiasm.
A special thank you to Angela Loëb for sharing her insights about leadership with us today! Stay tuned every Friday as the I Am A Leader blog series continues. Please share this blog post via Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn. Let's continue the conversation on Twitter using the #iamaLEADER hash tag! You can connect with SOS Leadership on Twitter here and Angela Loëb here.
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